I find it amazing how every single possible thing I really want to say here will most likely bite me in the arse. It's been over a year now that I've disappeared, and what has changed?
I once created a saying for myself, a sort of mantra that I'd forget and remember at chaotic intervals... the thought was spawned when I was thinking about my future and lack of drive.

"I'd rather have a destiny too great for me than be too great for my destiny."

You listen to all the conflicting ideas in the ever so reliable popular media, and you have to choose. Do I make my destiny, or is it chosen for me? Can I not, just by deciding to be great, create a future so bright its hard for even me to look? Then there's another one that's stuck with me... I don't remember where it came from. "There will come a day when you must choose between what is right and what is easy." I need to think that every day is that day, or the small and simple choices I'm faced with will shape my demise.

The easy thing right now? To let the reins of my life fall into the hands of others as my fear to move from my paralysis counters my every attempt at righteousness. But which other people are my reins falling into the hands of? Perhaps my thought of demounting and walking a while will do me some good after all, regardless of anyone who fears my sanity, be it shadow, perception, or the Royal mistresses of the Serpentine Mount. One pulls me North, the other pulls me South, and the last has a will so steadfast to not lay a hand on my fate that they shall incite a rage in me I haven't felt for years... until that pledge is worn off from the depths of my soul. I find my own path, and choose my destiny as I please...

So this was where the arse bites came into play. I see now.

Regardless of warnings, the future doesn't scare me at all...

But I am scared. Looking at the world, I can do ANYTHING. I could learn 5 different languages and move to Iran. I could fall flat on my face, as well, ending up like countless dreamers I've seen.

We shall see, shall we not... what will my vector be?